The Most Meaningful Way to Succeed is to Help Others Succeed

Success is not about winning a competition. It’s about making a contribution.

That was the thesis of my first book, Give and Take, which came out 10 years ago today. It was about the surprising consequences of being a giver—rather than a taker or matcher. Takers are selfish: they aim to be better than others. Givers are generous: they strive to bring out the best in others. Matchers try to be fair: they trade favors evenly. But they often come across as transactional. You didn’t really care about me—you were just paying off a debt or racking up credit.

Read More

HR Often Sucks. Here’s How It Could be Better

Ask many corporate workers what they think of human resources, and they’ll rattle off a litany of stereotypes: HR is incompetent, any brush with HR spells bad news, or that HR will always toe the company line. Above all else, people tend to believe that HR represents the employer and simply can’t be trusted to have their best interests at heart. Multiple studies have found that, on average, nearly half of employees don’t trust HR or feel comfortable confiding in their HR leaders.

Read More

Why Friendships Among Men Are So Important

When we got married, my husband had a “bachelor party” that consisted of five guys going out to dinner together. There was no heavy drinking or roasting the groom or naked women jumping out of a cake. Just guys sitting around talking about life. This group has been meeting regularly ever since, taking turns hosting brunch so they can chat for hours, sharing the joys and struggles of their lives.

Read More

ChatGPT Invades the Workplace

A new Korn Ferry survey on the use of ChatGPT in the workplace leaves no doubt that the artificial-intelligence platform—only months old—has captured the business world’s attention. According to the survey, which polled professionals across industries, 46% are already using ChatGPT to complete work tasks. More telling, upwards of 80% say ChatGPT is a “legitimate, beneficial work tool” that will be a regular part of their workday in the future.

Read More

Adding a ‘Scary Hour’ to Your Morning Routine Could Be the Secret to More Productivity and Focus

What is a scary hour? In her video, which has more than 1 million views, Wheeler says she sets a timer for one hour and works only on tasks she’s been avoiding because of anxiety. Indeed, feelings of stress make us more likely to procrastinate, according to Alicia Walf, a neuroscientist and senior lecturer at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute in New York. According to research, 20% of U.S. adults are chronic procrastinators, meaning they procrastinate at home, at work, in relationships, and more.

Read More

Everyone Messes Up. Here’s How to Say You’re Sorry.

If you can’t remember the last time you apologized: congratulations, you are perfect — or at least you believe you are. For the rest of us, apologizing is a common, if difficult, part of life. Among the earliest lessons imparted to children is the art of saying sorry, yet these skills don’t always transfer neatly to adulthood. Relationships are messy and both parties often have some level of culpability. However, the biggest obstacle to apologetic bliss isn’t a complicated argument — it’s self-protective motivations.

Read More

Zen Expert Who Works With Google Says This Is the No. 1 Way to Deal With ‘Difficult’ People at Work

Let’s face it, you won’t see eye-to-eye with everyone you work with — no matter how hard you try. From co-workers to bosses, there are probably more than a few people who you consider to be difficult.

And we’re all the “difficult person” in at least one other person’s story, says Marc Lesser, a Zen teacher and executive coach with clients like Google and Facebook, and CEO of consulting company, ZBA Associates.

Read More

7 Common Qualities of Credible People

Credibility is an increasingly valuable attribute today. Perhaps to no one’s surprise, the 2023 Edelman Trust Barometer found a rise in polarization, with the U.S. falling in the top quarter of countries deemed “severely polarized.” But business bucks that trend. Edelman’s research found that business is now not only the most trusted institution but also the only one trusted globally. In addition, the research found that respondents overwhelmingly expect CEOs to use their resources to “hold divisive forces accountable,” according to the report’s press release.

Read More

‘Managers Play A Crucial Role’—Leaders React To Employee Mental Health

Mental health is a topic of critical importance and front of mind for so many of us. My series on mental health has generated comments, ideas and recommendations—and it’s worth considering all the ways the collective thinking about mental health will shape responses from leaders and organizations.

Hundreds of readers shared in comments on LinkedIn and other social media about the pressures they feel as leaders, the risk of burnout, and how best to support themselves and their teams during difficult times.

Read More

How to Optimize Your Anxiety, Rather Than Let It Hold You Back

For my entire life, I’ve struggled with anxiety, insomnia, and obsessive worries about things I can and can’t control. My friends chide me as the most paranoid risk-taker they know. Sometimes it helps me, but sometimes it absolutely doesn’t. When I’m facing a big moment, I can become absolutely paralyzed and completely unproductive. My body rebels, putting my success at risk simply because my brain won’t shut off and let me get rest. It’s a fight-or-flight response, a constant need to be at high alert—to look for danger.

Read More

Why Self Awareness Is The Most Important Skill For Hybrid Leadership

Ask 100 leadership experts what the most important leadership skill is for the new hybrid workplace and you may get responses like listening, vulnerability, emotional intelligence, humility, coaching, etc. There have been many studies and articles with solid reasoning for developing all of those soft skills in leaders. But many of these abilities are based on one truly important attribute that accelerates our growth in most aspects of life: Self-awareness.

Read More

Words and Phrases to Avoid in a Difficult Conversation

When you’re in the middle of a difficult conversation, it’s common to focus solely on yourself: your ideas, your viewpoint, and your feelings. But a “me-centric” approach can backfire. To achieve your goal, you need to think beyond yourself. While crafting your message, you must keep the other person’s feelings and opinions in mind, too. To do so, avoid these common mistakes: don’t assume your viewpoint is obvious; don’t exaggerate; don’t challenge someone’s character or integrity; don’t blame others for your feelings; don’t tell others what they should do; and don’t say “It’s not personal.”

Read More

I've Been a Leadership Coach for 20 Years. Here Are 3 Things I Found Most Bosses Drastically Lack

If you've ever had the privilege to work for a good leader, you've probably noticed that they have their people's best interests in mind. In other words, they genuinely care about the success of their people -- including their career goals and aspirations. It is counterintuitive for most bosses to naturally gravitate toward caring and serving the needs of others due to competing demands, including pressures to meet their own performance expectations.

Read More

What the Longest Happiness Study Reveals About Finding Fulfillment

What makes for a happy life? Philosophers have pondered this question for millennia, coming up with different theories and recommendations for people to follow, but not necessarily having any hard evidence to prove their ideas. That’s what inspired the long-running Harvard Study of Adult Development. Starting in the 1930s, researchers tracked men from different neighborhoods in the Boston area over several decades, asking them to provide regular updates on their lives, including their current health, income, employment, and marital status.

Read More

The Breaking Point for Middle Managers

It’s been a tried-and-true corporate strategy since the 1980s. If layoffs need to be done, fire the middle managers. They’re the group responsible, in the minds of many executives, when an organization becomes inefficient. True to form, the rounds of restructurings recently announced in technology, logistics, and other industries have targeted corporate midsections. But experts warn that removing too many middle managers—and putting too much pressure on those that remain—can jeopardize many corporate priorities, such as innovation and diversity initiatives.

Read More

When Leaders Struggle with Collaboration

It’s not uncommon for talented leaders to find collaboration unnatural. After all, rugged individualism set them apart and propelled their careers. And for many, that same focus on distinguishing themselves later becomes their demise. Most of an enterprise’s competitive value is created and delivered at organizational “seams,” where functions come together to form capabilities (think marketing, consumer analytics, and R&D, together developing innovation capability). That requires leaders of those functions to collaborate across the siloes to deliver that value. If you’re a leader who struggles to collaborate with your peers, you first need to understand why that is, then work to develop that skill

Read More

The 10 Most In-Demand Skills Employers Want to See on Your Resume Right Now

The list of skills at the bottom of your resume might feel like an afterthought, but that section is more important than you might think — especially if you’re hoping to land a new job soon. A majority of companies (76%) are using skills-based hiring to fill open roles, with more than half (55%) using role-specific skills tests to vet candidates, according to TestGorilla, an Amsterdam-based HR tech firm. These numbers are from an October 2022 survey of 2,736 employers in the United States, United Kingdom, and other countries.

Read More

15 Things Emotionally Mature People Do

Emotional maturity is the number one most important thing in relationships, the number one skill set we can work on to get great ones, and the number one most important thing to a happy and effective life. Contrary to some misconceptions, emotional maturity is not about “self-mastery,” or self-development. Mature people may pursue these, but they have nothing to do with emotional maturity.

Read More